Positive Mindset for Moms – 7 Tips to Help You Transform Your Outlook
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I have a confession – sometimes I struggle with low self-worth and negativity. I’m fairly certain I’m not alone, though.
Being a mom has brought me some of the most joy-filled moments of my life – but it’s also brought me some of the biggest challenges of my life. I try my best to appreciate and live in each moment, but there are definitely days when I feel like I’m failing or that the day will never end.
When I’m struggling, I know that I need to pull myself out of the funk – and FAST. How do I do that? By doing my best to stay positive.
It’s essential to have a positive mindset in order to manage all of the duties of motherhood. A positive mindset will help you to stay calm and collected during stressful situations, have more patience with your children, and be more optimistic about the future. It’s a vital tool for us crazy busy ladies!
So how can you go about developing a positive mindset for yourself? It starts with understanding what mindset actually is.
What is Mindset?
Your mindset includes your thoughts, words, beliefs, and outlook on the world and your place in it. It influences your feelings, emotions, and really every part of your daily life. Your mindset affects how you view your past, how you feel and act today, and the goals you set for the future.
In the simplest of terms, your mindset is how you view the world and your place in it.
If your thoughts, words, and beliefs are negative, your mindset is probably also negative, and you’ll have a negative attitude toward life. You’ll see life as a difficult place full of limitations and challenges. You might feel like nothing will work out in your favor and that things just aren’t meant to be good for you.
You’ll also be less happy and more dissatisfied with your life. You’ll constantly be chasing after things that you think will make you happier, without much success.
On the flip side, if your thoughts, words, and beliefs are generally positive, you most likely have a positive mindset and a positive attitude toward life!
A positive mindset allows you to focus on the good, be open to possibilities, and be optimistic. It means feeling joyful, grateful, hopeful, and inspired.
It allows you to see the world as an abundant place with endless possibilities. You’ll believe that you can achieve anything you set your mind to, and you’ll be confident in your abilities.
You’ll also be happier and more content with what you have in life. You won’t be chasing after something more or better, because you understand how to find happiness wherever you are.
A positive mindset opens allllll the doors!
Benefits of a Positive Mindset
I mean, where do I even start? There are soooo many benefits to cultivating a positive mindset. It truly helps you in all areas of your life. I’ll share a few:
- Better health: Mayo Clinic reports evidence that a positive mindset provides many health benefits, including increased life span, lower rates of depression, better cardiovascular health, and greater resistance to illness.
- More happiness: Positive thoughts increase serotonin, AKA the feel-good hormone. Since you’re actively looking for happiness with a positive mindset, you’ll find it.
- More productivity: You’ll achieve your goals much faster simply by believing you can! You’ll also be able to get more done because you’ll overcome challenges and setbacks much more easily.
- Less stress: Having a positive mindset can decrease cortisol, which is a stress hormone.
- More energy: What mom doesn’t need more energy, right?!!
- Greater self-confidence: When you’re thinking positively, you gain a greater belief in yourself and your abilities. If you get really good at it, you’ll feel like you can do anything!
It’s so amazing to me that we can reap all of these benefits just from thinking positively!
A Positive Mindset Can (and Will) Change Your Life
It’s not natural for some (or even most) people to be positive all the time. But it’s so, so important because your thoughts can change your life.
Everything you do in your life – your achievements, your failures, etc. – are shaped by the thoughts in your mind.
Everything starts with a thought. Your thoughts become your feelings, your feelings influence the way you take action, and your actions lead you to your results.
If you’re not happy with where you are in your life, you have the power to change literally EVERYTHING by changing your thoughts.
I know, that’s a pretty bold statement. But I firmly believe it to be true!
Developing a positive mindset is key to living a joyful life. When you have a positive mindset, you are more likely to see the good in every situation and find happiness in the simplest things. A positive mindset allows you to approach life with hope and optimism, which can lead to greater success both personally and professionally.
It’s not easy, and you have to work on it constantly. It takes time and effort to change those deeply rooted thoughts and beliefs. Changing the way you think is a huge part of getting the results you want in your life.
If you can learn how to master your mindset and stay in the land of positive thoughts, your whole world will change.
But how can you keep your thoughts – your mindset – positive? Here are a few ways.
How to Develop a Positive Mindset
#1 – Reframe the Negative
Sometimes it’s near impossible to completely avoid negative thoughts, but you can challenge them by changing them.
Try reframing. Any time you catch yourself thinking negatively, change that negative thought into a more positive version.
Turn “I can’t do this!” into “I can’t do this yet.”
Or “I’m a horrible mom – I can’t believe I yelled so long and so hard at my kids AGAIN!” into “I’m a pretty good mom, even though I slip up sometimes, and I know I can do even better.” And then figure out the next right thing to do or say to get you going in the right direction.
Another way to do this is to look for the silver lining. When you’re feeling negative, ask yourself, “What is good about this?”
It can be hard to think of the good when you’re in the depths of the not-so-good, but when I practice this particular version of reframing the negative, I’m usually surprised at what I come up with, and I’m always feeling more positive after I think of a few things.
If my car isn’t working right on a day when we had a bunch of things to do and fun plans with friends, rather than feeling upset or overwhelmed, I try to remember that staying home all day with the kids can also be a blessing. We can get a few things done around the house, do some school, maybe play some board games or watch a movie together… Sometimes a random day “off” is just what we need to reset and reconnect.
Reframing your negative thoughts can be challenging, but after a while, it becomes second nature to flip a negative to a positive or add “yet” to the end of a sentence.
#2 – Take Responsibility
Stop blaming other people or situations for your problems – and stop blaming yourself as well.
Life isn’t something that just “happens” – it’s something that we can shape and control.
A lack of responsibility for your life can show up as extreme pessimism, a victim mentality, indecision, or frequent arguments. When you take responsibility, you’ll notice that more things will go in your favor.
If you don’t like how something is going, think of what aspects can be controlled by you, and change those things rather than blaming yourself or someone or something else.
Once you realize that you are the one creating your results, you can take action to make sure that you’re living a better and more successful life.
Yes, some things are out of your control, and you can’t change them. And letting go of blame doesn’t justify the unfair actions of others or ignore life’s hardships.
But you can change how you react to them. You can remember that your life is about you, stop blaming others, and reclaim the freedom and power that belongs to you.
The only person you can change is yourself. Choose to react with positivity.
#3 – No More Comparing!
This one is so hard, especially in the age of Pinterest and Facebook and all of those lovely sites where people only put the best of the best out there.
Comparing yourself to others often makes you feel bad about yourself, which starts the negative self-talk.
One of the things that I’m hardest on myself about is homeschooling – in particular the fun stuff, like art. I don’t particularly like it. I’m not great at it. And I hate cleaning up the mess after my four kids tear through the paint, clay, or glue like crazy people.
(Listen to me with the fabulous self-talk – lol!)
But of course, art projects are what my kids want to do every day. And so many of my friends love the hands-on, artsy projects and do them often with their own kids. Which makes me feel “less-than,” because I do whatever I can to avoid them.
There’s a flip side to comparison, too – comparing yourself to others can make you feel good about yourself sometimes, but is that really the kind of “good” you want to feel – the “good” that comes at another’s expense? No. Absolutely not.
Stop comparing yourself to others. Focus on yourself, your own goals, and what you need to do to accomplish those goals.
Everyone in this world is different, with different strengths and weaknesses. Be yourself – you’re the best YOU that there is!
#4 – Change Your Self-Talk With Affirmations
A positive mindset begins with positive self-talk.
Self-talk consists of all the thoughts that run through your head that are about you. These thoughts can be positive or negative – but obviously we want them to be positive. There is so much power in your words, whether they’re running through your thoughts or being said out loud.
Using positive affirmations is an easy way to ensure that you’re speaking nicely to yourself. Affirmations are a self-help strategy used to build self-confidence and belief in your own abilities. You determine your own affirmation statements in advance, and you can repeat them to yourself whenever you need them – like a mantra or a “canned” saying that resonates with you.
Affirmations can help you to overcome self-sabotaging and negative thoughts. When you repeat them often, you’ll start to believe in them and see positive changes in yourself. They’re a great way to focus on positivity!
When I first started using affirmations, they totally felt cheesy and fake at first. But over time, I eventually started to feel optimism and positivity where it was lacking before, and I know they’ll work for you, too.
Here are a few of my favorites:
- I can only do what I can do.
- I will not compare myself to other moms – these are my children for a reason.
- Done is better than perfect.
- I am enough.
#5 – Read Personal Growth Books and Listen to Personal Growth Podcasts
One of my most favorite tips for any mom who wants to develop a positive mindset is to put as much personal growth media into her head as possible! My preferred methods are books and podcasts, but you can read blogs, watch TED talks, or find Facebook groups devoted to personal growth as well.
Reading keeps your brain sharp and helps you think more positively, no matter what you read. However, if you want the most bang for your buck, personal growth / self-improvement books are the way to go. They can help us grow into the people we’re truly meant to be with all of their fresh ideas and new possibilities.
Podcasts are also a great way for busy moms to find time for personal growth because you can listen while you’re driving, cleaning your house, or working out – they don’t take any additional time from your day. I don’t generally recommend multitasking, but podcasts are an exception to that rule because you can tune in while you’re working your way through that never-ending pile of laundry 😉
What you put into your brain is what comes out of your mouth when you speak. It’s also what comes out in your mind when you’re talking to yourself. Once you start working on your self-development, you’ll notice positive changes in yourself and the way you interact with those around you – and it’ll happen with very little effort on your part!
#6 – Practice Gratitude EVERY Day
Gratitude is such a simple habit that really does bring you into a more positive, happier mindset.
It’s as simple as being thankful for your health, your family, the roof over your head, the morning coffee that jumpstarts your day…
When you first start seeking out things to be grateful for, it may not seem like anything is happening. However, over time, you’ll notice a shift – you’ll start seeing the small things you used to take for granted, and you’ll focus on and be more positive about what you have rather than what you lack.
The best time to practice gratitude is first thing in the morning or right before bed. It starts your day in a positive way if you do it when you wake up. If you opt to do it right before bed, it reinforces the fact that today actually was a good day!
Focus on what you have now, not what you want to have in the future, and be grateful for and happy to have it, and more wonderful things will come your way.
These are just a few tips to get you started. The most important thing is to be consistent with it and keep working at it over time. It won’t happen overnight, but with patience and effort, you can develop the habit of having a positive mindset, and it WILL change your life for the better.
There are people out there who say that happiness is a choice, and I believe it. Changing the way we think about our lives, ourselves, and our surroundings brings forth that choice of happiness.
I know that it’s hard, especially when bad things are happening all around you. But if you keep up with the tips above, you’ll realize that you can actually stay happy if you want to, no matter the situation.
You CAN choose positivity – it just takes practice!
So, how will you go about developing a positive mindset for yourself? What tips do you have to share with other moms? Share your thoughts in the comments below!